A Word of Blessing

One of the most encouraging things in my ministry (and in the ministries of most of my preacher friends) is the verbal encouragement I get from the brethren with whom I serve. That encouragement comes from statements made directly to us (my preacher friends and me) by appreciative brethren and it comes from our names and families being mentioned in public prayers.

I could not possibly know each one who reads this personally. That’s all right, though. God knows you and even if I only know you indirectly through someone else, I still want to encourage you. As I write this note, I have prayed for you. I want you to know that I do not consider this just a good writing exercise, but a truly encouraging note to help you get started in your week.

I am constantly amazed at how many times someone has been encouraged by one of these notes or in something else I said that was not planned. What I mean by that is that I may have intended to encourage someone one way, and God worked it so that someone (maybe someone else) was encouraged in a way I could never have anticipated.

In an earlier note, we spent time discussing Ephesians 4:29 and Paul’s command to speak encouraging words according to the need of the moment. All of us should take that command to heart. However, sometimes we don’t know all the needs of the moment. I’ve found that if you keep trying to bless instead of curse with your speech (Romans 12:14), you can encourage and not even know it. In those times I spoke of in the previous paragraph, the only way I know someone has been encouraged was that they told me so.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person” (Colossians 4:6). I know you have relationships where even what would normally be considered a cutting remark, spoken in a joking manner, serves to strengthen a relationship rather than weaken it. Those kinds of relationships are good and healthy. However, even then we need to be sensitive to the need of the moment. There are times that even with my best friends, I need to weep with them and not try to make them laugh right this minute.

I want to encourage you to encourage others. Say a prayer for someone right now. Let him know you have prayed for him (or her). Tell her how much you appreciate her. That may not come naturally to you. It’s true that some people find this easier to do than others. I feel confident, though, that if you will try it, you’ll find that the initial discomfort will change to a pretty good feeling. There is very little that satisfies more than making someone smile or feel better. And it doesn’t really take any more effort to bless than to curse.

I pray that God will bless each one of you as you read this. I know He loves you and I want you to know that I love you, too!

Donnie Bates

Friendly Fire

It is a sad fact that sometimes Christians are wounded by the words and actions of other Christians, rather than from the blows of the enemy. Few things are more discouraging than the injury suffered at the hands of those who are supposed to be on our side.

It’s important that those who are supposed to be on the Lord’s side not fight among themselves. Now, some people feel that such discord is so dangerous and upsetting that any kind of compromise should be made so that there be no such disagreement. In other words, it is more important that we are on the same side than it is to be on the right side. Others just decide that we can agree to disagree. You go to heaven by one way and I’ll be by another.

Before we go any further, we must point out that there are some things concerning God, the Bible, salvation, and related subjects upon which we simply must agree. If, for example, you do not believe that Jesus is the Son of God, Who died to give you hope of eternal life, you are not a candidate for salvation. And no matter how much I like you or think of you, I cannot agree with you and be pleasing to God, nor can I agree to disagree with you and treat you as though your beliefs on the subject of Jesus Christ are acceptable to God or of any value to you in terms of your eternal destiny. Let me also add that disagreeing with someone on this subject does not equal “friendly fire.”

What we mean by “friendly fire” is the harming of brethren unnecessarily. Whether a Christian is defending the truth, or is defending a false doctrine he has come to believe, when he or she defends that position with an attitude that hurts and damages other Christians, he/she is guilty of friendly fire; guilty of doing harm to one who is supposed to be an ally. Some may be puzzled that we included those who are defending the truth in this scenario. It’s true that even those who speak the truth can do so without love and hurt rather than heal. The sword of the Spirit (the word of God, Ephesians 6:17) is very sharp. That means those who handle it (see 2 Timothy 2:15) should be very careful that they do not mishandle it and do damage. Jesus writes: “Do not speak against one another, brethren. He who speaks against a brother, or judges his brother, speaks against the law, and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law, but a judge of it” (James 4:11). We must be very careful not to speak evil of or against our brethren.

How, then, do we reprove and rebuke our brethren, as we are so clearly commanded to do (Titus 1:13; 2 Timothy 4:2)? Well, we have to do it with patience and humility (Galatians 6:1; 1 Peter 3:15). We cannot be afraid to wield the sword of the Spirit just because we are afraid we will cut someone. We have to learn to wield it without cutting unnecessarily. Sometimes that’s not very easy, but war is never supposed to be easy. And we are at war! Let’s remember that our brethren, even brethren with whom we disagree strongly, are not the enemy.

Friendly fire is a danger anytime there is conflict. That’s not said as an excuse, but as a warning. It’s a danger we must try very hard to avoid. God loves each one of us and if you have suffered at the hands of your brethren, He knows your pain. And if you have inflicted any such pain, He knows that, too. Peter writes that we are to love the brotherhood (1 Peter 2:17). Earlier he had said, “Since you have in obedience to the truth purified your souls for a sincere love of the brethren, fervently love one another from the heart” (1 Peter 1:22). Friends, God loves you and so do I. Let’s be very careful not to hurt and injure with our words, but speak words of encouragement according to the need of the moment (Ephesians 4:29).

Donnie Bates